My weekend!

Well what a weekend!
I used to dread every weekend, every family party every public holiday when where ever you go you see happy families playing,walking and picnicing. I would always look at everyone and envy them because they had something I never did. A Weekend husband and father!
Craig is a Chef so his hours are or should i say were horrible. he would work 5-6 days a week from 9am and sometimes not finish till 1030pm.
This all changed about 3 months ago when Craig had enough and handed in his resignation. Miss B was 18months old and really didnt know who daddy was, to her he was a man that was here when she was asleep and left when she woke up.
When his boss read the letter he dragged Craig to the office and after saying he didnt want to lose him was given every weekend off +mondays to seal the deal. It is amazing how our family life has changed. we are all happier and so much more relaxed.Miss B now idolises her daddy and he loves every second.

I am right now laughing at myself! I have just realised how much I can crap on..... lol!

Last night I went out with a few friends to a gay bar. It is only on once a month and I do try to go most times,Its great. I Love the music, the people and the fact that nobody judges you. And yes I am Bi and Hubby has no problem with it at all... We have our rules etc and we are both very happy with the realationship. God what guy wouldnt be LMAO!! I can go there and Drink dance and have an awesome time and never worry about what others think of this fat Bi chic bouncing around the dancefloor! LOL
Last night was no exception. We drank we danced and I even ran ito old friends I have not seen for years. I even heard what an old friend is saying behind my back! what a crack! Apparently.... She has cut ME off because she cant stand to see ME Cheat on Craig!!! LMAO!! As IF!!!!
I would love to know how with 3 kids, 1 being a very active toddler and a house and hubby to look after, where do I find the time??
Its comments like this that used to drive me insane. I would worry for days, not sleep and really end up in a terrible state if people were talking behind my back but now, I am not letting it bother me.
One of the first things I was told at the Spirituallist Church was "whatever you send out will one day come back" I suppose you could read this many ways but to me I will NOT let others upset me and make me feel or have negitive thoughts. In a way i have imagined a type of barrier around myself and I am letting all that negitive energy pass around me and not giving it a thought. (Well trying hard to) There is so much I could do or say or I could fight to clear my name but why? That is focusing on the negitive I want positive. anyone who knows me INR or otherwise knows thats not me. Shit I have NO confidance to approach a guy let alone sleep with one.LOL
I did tell Craig this just incase it came back to him and he thinks its funny, He knows and I know so thats all that matters.
So after many drinks and many laughs I stumbled into bed at 3am. And today NO hangover! How lucky is that?

So much for my brief rundown of the weekend, his was ment to be about other things.

A question....
Do you ever feel/see something thats not there?
In the last week or so I have more and more. Im not sure if it is because of the meditation and the fact that I am learning or becoming more aware or is it just my imagination?
I could be sitting here and see a movement over my shoulder (always my left) and I turn and there is nothing. Other times its like flashes of light. even In bed I have woken to what I think are voices but I cant understand or make out words...
Maybe I am going loopy!!

Well I will try and add more tomorrow. My plan tonight was to tell about the church services and healings but I have been a tad sidetracked!

Take care all
and Remember.... Whatever you send out will come back!

Love oxoxox